“Ew mommy, what happened to your tummy?” my little girl asked me, while keeping me company in the bathroom. Apparently I need supervision while I shower. Mind you, I knew the day would come when my kids would start paying attention to body parts. I just didn’t expect that MY body would be the first point of interest.
If I were to be sincerely honest – and I plan to be, because this blog is my therapy space – her question totally and completely devastated me. I mean, to say it nicely: it made me feel lekker junk.
It made me feel junk because, I mean, who has lus to hear about their flaws, and from their own offspring nogals.
But, it also made me feel junk because you kinda expect your child to think that you are a superhero (until they are 14 and detest the way you chew you food). I didn’t want my 6 year old to see me as weak or flawed, I guess.
Anyways… as this, and a billion other things (like: “dammit I need to go on that onion diet”) run through my head in a matter of seconds, I had to come up with a wise response to madam’s question.
Our conversation went something like this:
Karis: Ew, mommy what happened to your tummy?!
Me: My tummy looks like this because I’ve had FOUR babies in it!
Karis: Is that alot?
Me: Well, yes, can you think of another mommy who has had four babies in her tummy?
Karis: (trying to calculate) Uhhhhhh no…
Me: There are many different ways to become a mommy, but not many mommy’s have had four babies in their own tummy’s. So yes, it’s alot. (Me trying to not sound defensive lol)
Karis: But mommy, I’ve seen other mommy’s who have tummy’s like yours too and I don’t think they’ve had four babies in it.
Me: That’s because a mommy’s tummy is a magical place… even if she’s only had 1 baby in it!
Karis: (scrunching her nose) Is that why your tummy is so big?
Me: Yes! Because a baby has to grow and live in a mummy’s time for a long time before it comes out! So that’s why my tummy is so fluffy.
(Can we all take a moment to collectively laugh at the fact that I called my tummy “fluffy”)
Me: (bracing myself for questions about how babies get into tummy’s in the first place)
Me: Yes babes (trying to quickly put on a t-shirt before homegirl asks me why my boobs are so saggy lol)
Karis: I think I also want to have four babies one day…
Me: (burst into a flood of tears, as I rock back and forth, on the floor in fetal position)
Kidding. But I did have a moment of intense pride. And it totally did kick the butt of my insecurity. The conversation reminded me that I am the blueprint… If I want my daughter to love her body, I need to show her that I love mine. These days I am a lot more mindful about what I speak over myself, especially when I am around her.
My body – your body – is a gift. God’s grand design. I want her to grow up knowing that no matter how toned or not toned her ab muscles are, or how jiggly her thighs are or how wide her hips are… she is His precious masterpiece and her body was created with purpose and beauty in mind.
So that’s my reminder to you today my friend. You are a masterpiece. Fluffy tummy and all