• Internalised sexism is a real thing
    Heart matters

    Women against women. Internalised sexism is a real thing.

    Today is International Women’s Day … a day dedicated to spreading awareness around the challenges that we face as females. I mean, yay, amazingness! Woohoo! I promise I’m not being sarcastic (well, not that much). But ya, we are going to need more than just a day to fix all the damage and trauma endured all these years. And while I 10000% stand by the campaign to end gender bias and gender inequality, I think that we also need to remember that internalised sexism is a real thing. Yes, I said “internalised sexism”. What does that look like, you ask? Definition: “Internalised sexism is a form of sexist behaviors and…

  • What kind of friend are you?
    Heart matters

    What kind of friend are you?

    I recently had a very long chat, with a very old friend of mine and it was filled with all sorts of complaining. We moaned about the fact that we are getting old. She showed me her swollen thumb. I told her that I don’t understand how people make Tik Toks that requires 7 outfit changes. We both need more money. I mean, if you were a fly on the wall, you would wonder why on earth we would dedicate a whole conversation to, well… moaning. The thing is this though… why would we not? I have a lot of friends – really great pals, all of them. People who…

  • 5 tips on how to be inspirational
    Heart matters

    5 tips on how to be inspirational

    Being “inspirational” is a thing these days – did you know? I mean, if you want to stay relevant and top-of-mind, that is. We stan a relevant queen – mos. And a “relevant queen” is an inspiring queen. Mos. I mean, let’s be honest, more than anything, people are scouring the interwebs looking for other people to emulate. Take me for example. If you are aspiring to be a coffee-drinking hermit that binges Netflix while glaring at your phone because someone dares to actually call you instead of texting, then you’ve visited the right blog. Welcome kindred heart. Anyways, back to the point. I was sitting here, proudly peeping at…

  • Beauty pageant
    Heart matters

    Beauty pageant, shmeauty pageant

    What if I told you guys that I won my high school’s beauty pageant, back in 1999. Would it cause you to view me differently, I mean, knowing that I am an award winning model and all? Hehehe. I know, weird flex. Who brags about winning a teeny bopper beauty pageant more than 20 years ago. (Me, apparently.) But hey in my defense, my humble brag is a result of a cringey photo that I stumbled upon the other day. The photo reminded me of my teenage years that were riddled with self-doubt and body issues. (So that’s, like, all the normal stuff). In fact, entering that beauty pageant was…

  • Do you take things personally
    Heart matters

    Do you take things personally?

    “There’s a huge amount of freedom that comes to you when you take nothing personally.” I read this phrase over and over a couple of months ago, basically feeling my spirit jump around in my body with cheerleader pom-poms and a big placard that says “yaaaas queeeeeen!” (Whaaaaat? Sometimes my ‘spirit’ rocks a cheerleader uniform. I don’t choose these things, it chooses me.) Anyways, the confirmation in my spirit reminded me that this phrase right here is my jam. Not taking things personally is my go-to response when I read an offensive status update or when I overhear someone make a snarky comment. Not taking things personally helps me to…

  • 2021 Grateful
    Heart matters

    2021: Grateful

    Much like the rest of the world, I start off each year with a new motto/word/vision… because, in a nutshell, my aim is to not end the year the exact same way I started it. I mean, how morbid would that be? This isn’t a season of Bold and Beautiful, you know, where we never age and we basically live out the same storylines over and over until Brooke steals our husband. Life – God’s glorious design – is filled with bumpy rides and smooth roads with the sole purpose of, well, adding some scenery to our journey on earth. Sometimes a change in route is all that is needed…

  • 2020: The year that never was
    Heart matters

    2020: The year that never was

    Some would argue that it’s a bit too late to write a “year in review” post, since it’s day 3 into the new year already. Also, we are over 2020. There, I said it. I mean, 2020 is as tired as faux fur sliders. Some would even call 2020 “the year that never was” because it was so elusive and devastating. Much like faux fur sliders. But I digress… Regardless of how I feel about 2020, a “year in review” post is a must! Well, because I am a creature of habit and changing this particular habit is not one of the goals on my 2021 list. (Whaaaaat). Anyways, enough…

  • One truth about Covid-19
    Heart matters

    One truth about Covid-19

    I’m convinced, we love drama. I mean, if you consider the amount of fake news and Covid-19 conspiracies that frequent our Whatsapp broadcasts and Facebook timelines, you kinda have to wonder who is writing the script for this nonsense. (It’s posted on Facebook so it MUST be the truth. *insert eye roll*) If we had to be honest with ourselves we’d admit that at this point we kinda don’t know what to believe when it comes to coronavirus. Are the stats even real? Wasn’t it created by the Chinese government? Bill Gates wants to control our minds, right? Dunno. But there is ONE single truth that I DO know about…

  • An ode to 2020
    Heart matters

    An ode to 2020

    There are so many things that I wanted to accomplish in 2020. I had jotted it down in my diary, in January, planning events and strategies way in advance. You know mos – spreadsheet brain, and what not. But, alas, as fate would have it, 2020 would be that drunk uncle at family gatherings. You know, the one that starts out all cheerful and chipper, and then later causes havoc and destruction. Kidding. Let’s not blame an actual year for all the poo that we’ve had to endure. We blame the coronavirus. 2020 is just an innocent bystander. Anyways, blame games and finger pointing aside… it’s been a rather rough…

  • social media is a lie
    Heart matters

    My social media is a lie

    I try not to catch feelings. Mainly because catching feelings means that my hands are full. It hinders my productivity. But, the truth is that I DO catch feelings sometimes… and like an expert nogals. In fact, my husband would tell you that on a particularly challenging day, I’d be out here catching feelings like Mark Boucher in his heyday. So that’s, like, a lot of feelings being caught. Why the monologue about catching feelings? Well, Gladys, if you follow me on the socials you’ll know that we’ve experienced a lot of loss this year. Having to watch our loved ones say goodbye to family members, on repeat, over a…