Four kids later and I’m not coping

Im not copingI know it looks super cool to have a big family. I mean, our family photo’s are lit because there’s literally one of us in every single size and age group. But in reality, I feel as if I’m not coping. Four kids later and I kinda want to take a permanent vacation somewhere not here. Please? Okay, let’s stop being dramatic for like, a few seconds.

It all started this morning (I’m talking about the mini-emo session that I’m currently having) when I realized that I drove to work on fumes. I had forgotten to refuel the car because we were in a hurry to get the kids to school and ourselves to work. By the time I eventually rocked up at the office, I realized that it was probably the good Lord himself who safely delivered me here because the cars fuel light had been flashing since yesterday afternoon. No jokes.

There's not enough hours in my LIFE! #momvent

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Life has been crazy with a capital “cray”. Jo is a baby, so that speaks for itself. Kari… well, she’s turning three years old soon and she’s as diva as they come. And this is not me bragging. Kyle and Seth are writing exams soon and then there’s the guilt that we aren’t doing enough for them and with them. Pair this up with the fact that we only have one car now, and can you see where I’m going with this? (Or not going. One car, remember?)

Besides for just not having enough time or like, mental capacity, to parent four children and stay sane at the same time, you must remember that we also need to pay the school fees of four children. So a lot of side hustling happens regularly, with me writing and Chris computer-ing and music-ing (what else would you call it), but this means that we’re permanently busy. Oh and I didn’t even mention the other commitments we have. To top that off, we are married! Granted, it’s to each other and we can cut each other some slack on the married front, surely. But still. I can’t remember the last time I held my hubstopher’s hand, for FUN.

I'm not copingAnyways, so with that said, I’ve decided to take this moment and write a little emo post. Mainly because I know that “this too shall pass” and because I want to have this moment documented somewhere for the day when it does, so that I can look back and go “ahh, see, it did pass.” But also because I know that I’m not the only mom going through a complete season of overwhelm right now.

I’m not saying it’s “okay” to be overwhelmed. But I am saying that it’s okay to feel as if you don’t have all your ish together, all of the time. So this ones for you mom, who feels as if you’re not coping too. I see you, girl. You’ve got this. This too shall pass. This too shall pass.

7 Comments

  1. I feel you on this!Life can really get overwhelming,and it seems tooo much at times!But you seem to have good supportive hubby!I know the balance will come,especially the fact that God is always in control☺My hubby is my better whole,and he lifts me up when i go through these emo times,and vice versa.Nevermind the fact that im pregnant…Lord bless their patient hearts!

    • God totally knew what He was doing when He sent Christopher my way! I hear you, girlfriend 🙂 Oh and good luck with the rest of your pregnancy <3

  2. I sometimes wish that I was younger, so I could have had one more child (madness I know), but like this past week…with all 3 kids being sick and me being sick. But when my youngest is rocking a 40 degree plus fever at 1am…no matter how crap I feel, I need to be sponging him and making sure to get that temp down.

    There is no me and hubby time. The house is a mess..ALWAYS. And and and…. so I totally feel you. As we know…this too shall pass…. heck we may miss the crazy in like 20yrs. Who knows…..

    • Ugh, can totally relate!!!!! Look, one day they’ll have their own babies and our homes will be quiet and we’ll surely look back on this time with longing and heartache lol

  3. And yet you’re still doing it! You guys make it work,even though times are tough right now. You are amazeballs babe! Hope you’re taking stock of that,babe. Props to you. Also hope this season of trial will pass soon enough for you. Xxx

  4. I should probably not talk because I only have one little one in the house but it’s so overwhelming. Damn I can totally understand how you can forget things or just don’t have time to get to it. Strongs momma bear
    You’re doing a good job!

  5. Totally get it, most days i feel like am failing at almost all of my self assigned roles (mom, wife, business woman). But it does get better, especially if you get at least one good night’s sleep!

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